Conflict resolution is really a subset of communication, but for most couples, communication does not become problematic until there is a disagreement. Even though conflict may be rooted in poor listening skills, lack of affirmation, or clumsy expression of feelings, it deserves special attention because this is where couples most hurt.

Some couples resolve conflicts easily because they have easy- going personalities. Others have had good modeling from their family of origin. But at some point all couples face an issue, a disagreement, a fight that challenges their calm and their skills. It’s connected with the reality that our lives are connected.

When two people share living space, habits, dreams, and often children, there are bound to be times that they think differently and have different opinions on how to handle a situation. If this doesn’t ever occur, it is likely that one partner is avoiding a confrontation, submerging his/her identity, or always giving in. None of these is healthy for marriage over the long haul.

For Further Reading:

• Fighting for Your Marriage (3rd Edition) by Howard Markman, Scott Stanley and Susan Blumberg
• The Forgiveness Book: A Catholic Approach By Mary Ann Paulukonis
• After the Glass Slipper: Eight Proven Steps to Lasting Love by Jon and Beverly Meyerson
• The Honeymoon Habit: Lessons for Renewing Romance and Reconnecting With Your Spouse by Tony Garascia