Comments for For Your Marriage

Comment on The Pregnancy Blues by Grace Marie Rose

Grace Marie Rose — Thu, 03 May 2012 15:39:30 +0000

Whenever I am pregnant, I find myself reflecting on Mary in a special way. Remember, she went through all of it! What was she thinking? What was she feeling? It is fun to put yourself in her shoes and realize that she understands you in such a special way!!!
Also, put yourself in front of the Eucharist as often as possible. I have found that whenever I feel overworked and tired and like I am not doing any good for anyone, I need to spend a little time in front of Jesus in the Eucharist. An hour (even a half hour) can refuel and refocus you! (I have been known to pull a car full of whiny kids over to the nearest adoration chapel and march them all in because it was either that or I was going to become the old woman who lived in the shoe! Trust me, they all stop fighting and get peaceful in front of the Lord!)
Always put the Lord first and focus and doing His will and He will sustain you. Remember, he said, “Come to me all who are weary and I will give you rest.” (Matt. 11:28)
God bless you! :)

Comment on Blessed Holy Week! by mseel

mseel — Fri, 20 Apr 2012 20:08:58 +0000

Philippians 4:6-7 I’m a worrier too and this verse has given me so much comfort.

Comment on Paying the Tax Man by stephaniecalis

stephaniecalis — Thu, 12 Apr 2012 19:06:33 +0000

Having been married about 9 months, I know exactly what you guys mean about growing into each other! My husband and I have talked a few times lately about the greater comfort with each other that’s come with being married- you’re no less attracted to each other or less happy, just somehow more settled in and content with your changing relationship. Love reading this blog; Happy Easter, and God Bless (all three of you)!!

My blog for Catholic brides-to-be: captivetheheart.blogspot.com

Comment on Say “Cheese” by 5stringjg

5stringjg — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 17:16:55 +0000

Congrats!It is amazing when you can actually see for yourself the life that is developing. I was considered high risk so I got to see my baby on ultrasound once a week toward the end of my pregnancy. I loved it and looked forward to it every time.

Comment on To Fast–Or Not by Becky D.

Becky D. — Fri, 02 Mar 2012 02:47:44 +0000

I had not been Catholic for very many years before I was pregnant the first time. As I have learned more about pregnancy, breastfeeding, and fasting I want to say definitely and firmly- do not try to fast when you are pregnant, nursing, or have young children who are still waking up at night, getting sick unexpectedly, and generally wearing you down. Part of the point of fasting is to help us detach ourselves from being ruled by our bodily desires. When your body is being shared by another whole person, day in and day out, no break, when every decision we make, including what position we lie down to go to sleep in, takes into account that other person, that is a good opportunity to develop detachment. Jesus gave up His Body for us. In a different way every pregnant woman “gives up her body” for the baby, during pregnancy, birth and nursing.

Comment on The Name Game by mseel

mseel — Tue, 28 Feb 2012 21:28:31 +0000

If my parents had followed this ‘rule’ I wouldn’t have my name. My mom had a friend who was pregnant and had planned to name the baby my first name if the baby was a girl. My parents loved the name so much that they asked her friend if she would be offended if they named their baby the same name (these were pre-ultrasound days). The friend graciously replied that she didn’t have the ownership rights to any name. Sadly, they lost their baby (a boy). A few years later, they had a daughter and gave her ‘my’ name. And I got a neat story about how I’m named after someone who is younger than me. Oh, and the baby’s won’t have the same exact name – their last names will be different.

Comment on Riding the Emotional Roller Coaster by mseel

mseel — Tue, 28 Feb 2012 21:13:41 +0000

Sara, you might consider buying your maternity clothes from online retailers. In my experience, most of them offer free shipping and free return shipping.

Comment on The Name Game by SeaGell

SeaGell — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 23:03:12 +0000

I was due with my first of 4 daughters. As the first, we decided it would be a surprise. We picked out the name Moira Katherine for the girl’s name and Maximillian James if a boy. This was an early decision. We both LOVE the name Moira and it was my sister’s middle name. So when I was a month away from delivery, I ran into an old friend’s brother and I asked after her second pregnancy as she was due any day at that point. He said if it was a girl they were naming her Moira Catherine. WHAT??? And we live in nearby towns and see each other several time a year. Well, we both had the girls and named them Moira K(C)atherine. Our girls are 10 now and friends and are only a month apart. They love that they have a very unusual name but love to share it with each other. It gives them a bond.

I also has a friend would had a Catherine Mary. We have very close friends whose 3rd daughter was born and they named her the exact name. My first friend thought it was unusual since the fams are so close…but now it doesn’t even matter since they are at least 10 years apart.

So I wouldn’t worry too much about that…even if they were close by, your child is unique and will give their own spin to their name on personality alone…

+JMJ+ Blessings on your first!!

Comment on The Name Game by 5stringjg

5stringjg — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 18:40:00 +0000

If this other person is only an acquaintance who lives on the other side of the country and you will not likely be seeing or hanging out with them as your babies grow, then you should go with the name you really love and don’t worry about what anyone thinks. If you have a girl, no problem, but it seems women are usually pretty in tune with what they are having. If you are concerned about uniqueness, you might leave yourself open to other names you might hear or find. We didn’t settle on a name for our daughter until the last two weeks of my pregnancy and then we gave her three names, the first two because we liked them and they went well together and the last to honor my mom. So she kind of sounds like royalty now:)

Comment on The Sex Talk by jwarmus

jwarmus — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 23:28:49 +0000

Great blog entry! I couldn’t agree more with everything that you wrote! It takes a lot of pressure off of the woman to share fertility with her husband and we value that we started our marriage with NFP and we practice it and enjoy it! In the beginning our family and friends thought we were crazy to use NFP, but it enriches our marriage and our faith.

Thanks again!

Comment on No More “Superwoman” by 5stringjg

5stringjg — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 15:12:58 +0000

I was the same prior to pregnancy. I thought some women were just complainers. I had a very difficult pregnancy with my daughter and now I know better. It does open your eyes and creates a bonding experience with others who have gone through it. Sleep when you need to. Growing a baby is hard work. And it will be harder to get that rest later. We also moved when I was about 6 months pregnant and I had high blood pressure (pre eclampsia). I wanted everything done yesterday but I couldn’t do alot of it. It was frustrating! My husband finally moved the boxes out of the nursery and got most of it ready with only 6 weeks left to go and I went into labor 2 weeks early. Well, it all worked out. Hang in there. I enjoy hearing about your journey.

Comment on Pizza…and Pregnancy? by 5stringjg

5stringjg — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 15:00:41 +0000

That is wonderful! Congratulations! It is a very exciting time. Try not to worry. These things have a way of working themselves out and you will get lots of love, help and support from your families. You will love being parents. Very excited for you.

Comment on Dream Job by rosemars

rosemars — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 00:30:17 +0000

Best of luck in your new position – it sounds like an amazing job!

Comment on “And With Your Spirit” by 5stringjg

5stringjg — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 17:26:51 +0000

We definitely stumbled through it this past weekend. It was surprising to me how many times I forgot to say “and with your spirit”. I figure if my mom endured the changes after vatican II, I can get through this.

Comment on I didn’t blow up the house by 5stringjg

5stringjg — Sat, 19 Nov 2011 02:34:11 +0000

Very nice reflection. That’s a great way to look at a to do list.

Comment on Mind Your Own Beeswax! by TRose

TRose — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 17:59:57 +0000

My husband and I were blessed with a surprise baby boy 9 years after we were married and 5 years after a doctor told us that we would probably never be able to conceive. Those 9 months were difficult due to medical issues, but they were the most gloriously miraculous months of my life. Whenever I see a pregnant woman, I get misty-eyed and I hope that she is experiencing the same feeling I had – of being a walking miracle, touched by the almighty hand of God. It still makes me want to cry with joy and thanksgiving and my son is almost 11 now. Rather than attributing the questions to inquisitiveness or rudeness, perhaps you could assume that these folks are just wishing the same joy for you. Giving them the benefit of the doubt could make your reply a little easier. I also like the suggestions given above. Take care and may God bless you both abundantly.

Comment on Mind Your Own Beeswax! by jawns

jawns — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 16:47:29 +0000

When my wife and I were newlyweds, we decided we would neither actively try to conceive, nor actively try not to conceive. After nearly a year had passed with no pregnancy, we started to actively try to conceive, and we eventually went to a fertility specialist.

My wife and I were agreed that we would not pursue any treatments that would be inconsistent with our faith, but I still felt a little weird being there. It turned out that my wife had endometriosis — a common cause of fertility problems. She had an outpatient surgery to correct the problem, and two months later, we conceived without any other medical intervention.

Our experience has made me hyper-sensitive about fertility problems, and I make it a point to never tease any couples about when they’re going to have kids — because maybe they’re TRYING to have kids, and it just isn’t happening.

As for how to respond when someone asks you when you’re planning to have children … I didn’t mind indicating that we were open to children, so I would usually say something like, “It’s up to the Big Guy Upstairs,” or “Only time will tell.”

But if you want to avoid the question altogether, just give them a smile and ask pleasantly, “Why do you ask?” Or, via Miss Manners, “How soon do you need to know?”

Comment on Mind Your Own Beeswax! by 5stringjg

5stringjg — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 14:41:00 +0000

Let’s hope that by your writing this, some people will finally get it that it is impolite to ask such personal questions. It is really hard to come up with what to say without being rude. Maybe you could just say, “When we are expecting, I will be sure to let you know.” Maybe that will keep them from continually bringing it up. Good luck! I enjoy your blog posts.

Comment on Housekeeping and Prayers by mont

mont — Mon, 17 Oct 2011 23:20:29 +0000

Please share the traditions you end up choosing. Your post inspired to finally start our spiritual corner. God bless!

Comment on How Marriage Has Made Me a Better Person by estermp

estermp — Thu, 22 Sep 2011 14:38:31 +0000

I’m from Madrid (Spain), married this year also, the 2nd. of July. So we are kind of walking this road toghether! :) Thank you for all your posts, since many months ago, you have been a wave of hope in my life. God bless you and your marriage.

Comment on Housekeeping and Prayers by Sara

Sara — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 01:45:28 +0000

Good for you – glad to hear!

We’ll definately post more on our family faith traditions as we establish them. Keep reading, as one of our upcoming posts will be about our traditional Labor Day camping trip – our first as a married couple.

Comment on Housekeeping and Prayers by rczarn

rczarn — Mon, 29 Aug 2011 23:17:44 +0000

I really enjoyed reading this post and learning about family faith traditions. Please share the traditions you end up choosing. Your post inspired to finally start our spiritual corner. God bless!

Comment on How Many Children Should We Have? by tina

tina — Wed, 27 Jul 2011 14:38:54 +0000

Stacey, I enjoyed reading this article. My husband and I have been married for almost a year now, but friends and family have been asking us when we will have children and how many we’ll have from the day we announced our engagement. My response is always the same: “As many as God gives us.” Most of my peers go into marriage with a specific number and even names preset, and I’ve always felt different and uncertain with myself for not knowing how big or small I want my family to be. My husband feels the same way. When we were in high school together, my parents discovered they were pregnant with my sister; she’s a full 16 years younger than me, and 8 years seperate her from the next sibling. My parents graciously and excitedly prepared for her, and I believe that taught my husband and me that God will help our family to grow until He is satisfied with its size. Your article has bolstered our confidence to accept however many children God blesses us with. Thanks!

Comment on How Many Children Should We Have? by Amanda3701

Amanda3701 — Wed, 27 Jul 2011 13:52:43 +0000

Great post. We are firm believers in letting God decide our family size, as both our parents did a generation before us. Nobody is more surprised than me that we *only* have two children. We anticipated a minimum of thee and were comfortable with four or five (or more, if God so chose). My standard answer is “we will be done having children when I hit menopause.” Before then, only God knows. Our boys are 4 and 6 now, and even active trying for the past year produced no results. Maybe God knows our family is complete. We rust in him. Maybe he knows that we need a nreak for now to get things in order before we are blessed with another “later in life.” We are 36 and 37, but would never consider we are “done” having children. Unless that is God’s plan for us. I want to shout out to all those NFP naysayers that you don’t know unless you give it up to God. Easiest thing we have ever done.

Comment on How Many Children Should We Have? by krasinac

krasinac — Wed, 27 Jul 2011 13:19:16 +0000

Thank you so much for this article which is so timely right now in our life. We’re currently expecting our third child (fourth if you count the last baby we lost to miscarriage) and we are getting the same question, “Do you think you’re done having children now?” I used to be able to readily answer that question, “No, we’re open to more children and I can’t wait!” But now, faced with some growing pains financially and otherwise I can’t so easily say, “I can’t wait to have more.” It is suddenly feeling much harder to trust God’s will for our family. NFP will be a serious, serious concern after this child is born. We are committed to NFP, but nonetheless concerned what it means for our family if God’s will includes more children.